My Next Step

There are two things I’ve been praying for regularly.  One is a husband.  The other is my next step.

 

I came to Vilanculos more than one year ago because the Holy Spirit told me to come.  When I first visited Vilanculos in 2009, I specifically remember sensing the Lord’s leading to come back and reach out to the women here.  So since July 2011  (excluding my sojourn to America in May and June)I have been living in Vilanculos, building relationships with people, telling Bible stories to locals, praying a lot too.  Most people claim Christianity and may go to church but have minimal understanding of Christ and the Scriptures.  My heart is to see people grow and mature in their faith, because the majority of believers are “baby Christians”.   Leading Christians into spiritual maturity is my primary focus and purpose in ministry here in Vilanculos. 

I’ve built relationships with people here, taught them the Word, and prayed like crazy (with more frequency, passion, and authority).  God has also taught me more about my dependence on Him and as well as my authority in Christ to battle the evils I encounter. But to be honest my time here has been very trying and testing.  Personally, the most difficult thing has been the lack of community; I am and feel very alone in what I do. I don’t have co-laborers: people that I actually work with.  Even though right now there are two South African families that I “work with” in theory, I don’t really work with them.  This and many other factors have caused me to ask the Lord “how long I should be here?”  In March I started questioning and asking the Lord about being here and staying here, and in May He gave me peace about being here through December. My thoughts of leaving are not new or sudden but rather a gradual process that has developed over many months.  Therefore I plan to leave Vilanculos in December, and trust the Lord to guide me into the next step.  If you have questions about me leaving, feel free to ask.

However, one thing I know is that the Lord has called me to missions with my life. He has called me to the nations; my heart longs to be overseas.  Exactly what shape or form that will take is uncertain and may change.  I am looking for an organization that would be a good fit for me to partner with long term.  I would like to partner with an organization that has been established for a while that has already learned from years of experience.  Other characteristics I’m looking for include: a solid biblical foundation and values, integrity,  good leadership, accountability, community, goal- oriented, emphasis on discipleship and training local leaders, takes care of their missionaries, prepares and trains missionaries, expect and promote spiritual growth, dependence on the Holy Spirit, and lovers of God .

I’m looking into various mission organizations and opportunities.  On Saturday I’m planning to visit Iris Ministries’ children’s home in Maputo (Mozambique’s capital).    I’m also considering working with YWAM and have met the Brazilian YWAM staff that runs the base in Maputo.  Cru is another organization as well that has potential as I worked with them before.  So I am looking and am open to suggestions. I’ve also thought about studying theology and/or counseling.  I also know whatever I do, I’ll probably have to raise funds to do it as well.

I feel like the Lord has released me from being here and I’m in a weird period of transitioning out.  I deeply care for those I have grown close to but often I feel ready to leave.  I’m not planning to come back to Vilanculos- and depending on what the Lord has in store- I may not come back to Mozambique, but I think I will return to Africa at some point.  I’ve also been thinking about California, Argentina, and my curiosity about Brazil has been stirred as I’ve learned more about Brazil just being here- through Brazilians and media. Nothing is certain at this point, but it’s all in God’s hands.  Please pray that the Lord would make obvious His path for me and give me patience in the process.

I am content to go wherever He sends me. 

What do you do?

What do you do when you find out that one of your friends has AIDS?

Yes AIDS- the disease that kills millions of sub-Saharan Africans annually.

http://www.thisissierraleone.com/2012-world-hiv-report-sub-saharan-africa-hardest-hit-by-hiv-with-23-5-million-hiv-positive-people-in-2011-about-69-percent-of-the-global-total/

The link above has quick stats about AIDS around the world.  1.4 million or 11.5% of Mozambicans have AIDS.  If this is accurate, I know several people with AIDS (1/10 people I meet)- I just don't know that they have it.

So what do you do when AIDS is no longer that terrible disease that happens to "others", but someone you know and love has it?

Pray? Cry? 

Do what you can to connect them to a program distributing food and medication but still feel hopeless as you leave.

Trust God and walk away? 

Question God and walk away?

Curse God and walk away?

 (You must walk away at some point- you can’t stay forever)

Do I fully believe the words I utter, that God loves you?   

 Yes I do- but there’s so much I don’t understand.  God, don’t you see how much it hurts?

 But now I see why you, who has been sick on and off since I returned in July, have a hard time believing and accepting God’s love.

In this I’ve seen sacrificial love. Self-less love.  They’re “married”.  By that I mean they live together and called themselves married, without a formal or legal covenant (which by the way, is how most marriages are defined here (in Vilanculos), except there’s usually children too).  She has AIDS.  Apparently she had it before they “got married” and she told him.  So they’ve never actually been intimate…which explains why he is healthy and she is weak.  He hasn’t been working the last few weeks. He’s stayed home to take care of her.   It’s obvious that he loves her….his actions demonstrate affection in a way words cannot.  Few Mozambican men would do this.  Few men from any culture would do this.  He aches and weeps for her.

Will God heal?

A Mozambican Prayer.

I was recently in Maputo, the largest city and also the capital of Mozambique.   On September first there was large meeting in which many churches and other Christian organizations gathered to pray for Mozambique and hear from the Lord.  It was really powerful seeing them confess their personal as well as their country's sins, repent and believe God for renewal, hope and change.

One of the pastors speaking that day...there must have been at least 10 and they were rotating Scripture readings. 

 For me the most moving thing was one of the pastors standing up and publicly apologizing to his wife, on behalf of all Mozambican men who have wronged their wives in one way or another. He apologized for adultery, abandonment, laziness and several other vices.  He had only said a few words and many women around me started crying and then I started crying too.  It made a strong impact on me because I've seen how poorly women are treated here- and its hard to combat because there are historical and cultural roots with this problem.

Everyone prayed this prayer.  I think it gives a good general understanding of where Mozambique is in their relationship to God:

A day to bow before our God.  Mozambique bows before God. 1 September 2012

Let’s pray together: (everyone kneels)

O Lord, God Most High, Creator and Possessor of heaven and earth, we, the people of Mozambique acknowledge that we and our country have sinned against You in several ways, especially, but not limited to idol worship.  Instead of looking to You to satisfy our needs, at different points we have sought help from Satan.

We look to evil spirits for: rain, abundant harvests, children, health, progress, protection, direction, guidance, wealth, victory in war, and other innumerable blessings .  You have blessed us in more ways than we can count but we have not thanked you as God.  Countless times when we dedicate new buildings, bridges, roads, schools, etc. instead of thanking You, the Provider of all things, we look to priests of idols to mediate and make blood sacrifices to Satan and dedicate buildings to Satan. We dedicate ourselves, our wives and our children to the enemy in several ways, including but not limited to ceremonies such as welcoming a newborn, rites of passage, weddings, funerals, etc. We fear evil spirits, curses, witchcraft and dead family members more than we fear You. 

Instead of looking for Your direction, we regularly consult the dead and different evil spirits.  We enter into alliances with Satan through various methods and we turn our backs on You.  In arrogance our land declared, “There is no God.” 

  We have sinned against You in these and many other ways. Our sins include, but are not limited to the following:  Idolatry, the spilling of blood,  bribery,  corruption, atheism, assassinations, love of money, violence, rape, prostitution, bitterness, witchcraft, occultism, consulting dead ancestors, sexual sins, broken marriages, lack of the fear of God, sensuality, loving pleasure rather than loving God, disunity within the church, idolatry within the church, sins of occult in our lives, oppressing the poor and underprivileged, human sacrifice, human trafficking, slavery in modern day forms, drug abuse, selling of drugs, respect for tribal customs above the word of God,  lies, hypocrisy, false religion, illegality; etc.

Today we are guilty before You.

Today we declare the following:  We confess that we have established many altars to Satan throughout our country.  We repent for these altars.  We renounce all the altars of Satan established in our land.  We renounce all the evil alliances that we, our leaders and our country has made with Satan.  We renounce and we withdraw our submission to evil spirits to whom we were bound through these altars and alliances.

Today, we dedicate to You, our lives, our families, and the generations that have yet to come, forever.  To You we dedicate our nation and all of its resources.  By faith we form a New Alliance with You sealed by the blood of our Lord Jesus Christ.  We declare, “God is.”

Now and forever, we acknowledge you as our Creator, we honor you as our Father, we adore you as our God, we submit to you as our Lord and Savior, and we proclaim you our King.

Please forgive us our sins and heal our land according to your word. Please accept us and be our God.  Destroy all satanic foundations in our lives and nation.  Together we pray, “Our Father in heaven, Holy is Your name.  Your kingdom come and Your will be done in Mozambique as it is in heaven.  We declare that the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob is the God of Mozambique now and forever more.  Govern every area of our lives and our nation.  Let the knowledge of Your word cover our nation as waters cover the sea.  Open up the heavens above our land and bless us.” Amen.